Mirror Mirror on the wall….

The writing prompt said sit in front of the mirror and write honestly about what you see. Post40 blogging strikes again. Making me  Inspiring me to look at myself in the mirror and be reflectively honest .

It took me a while.  To sit in front of the mirror. To look hard at my face and to deal with the thoughts it provoked.

So, here I am. Mid fifties. I have a tanned face, as we have been out in the sun a lot lately. White lines where my glasses are seemingly permanent fixtures, despite having contact lenses. My eyes don’t seem as blue as they did, more grey now. The whites, not so white. The pores on my face seem much more open than they used to be. My eyebrows are still quite thick, although the odd grey hair is now appearing!

My hair line seems to be receding slightly, my hair as definitely changed since the menopause, it is greyer, as I grow out the hair dye, it doesn’t seem to grow as fast as it used to. This makes me wary of having a radical haircut just in case I don’t like it. My hair seems to be shapeless, as I try to work out what style to go for next. In the meantime, I try to blow dry my hair into some sort of shape away from my face.

My face. I look keenly to see what lines I have. My forehead seems strangely wrinkle free, but I have laughter lines around my eyes (or are they crows feet?), I have smiled a lot and laughed a lot through my life. I have bags under my eyes, and very hooded eyelids. This is a family trait. I wouldn’t change it. I don’t wear a lot of make up. I never have.  My skin seems quite plump, oh no, that’s fat. Be honest. I am overweight. My face is too. My cheeks are full and there must be cheekbones under there somewhere, and my chin, well, which one? Take your pick, there seem to be several! I have deep crevices leading down from my cheeks to the side of my mouth, even when I smile they are still there, and to be honest, I wish they weren’t. They make me look miserable, even when I am not. My lips are starting to thin. I hadn’t noticed this before. It all seems to be slipping south, however, I look again….

I see a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a great-aunt, a student, a creative person, a caring person, a shy person, a retired person, a book lover, a photographer, a person who has been hurt, grieved, been depressed, lonely, a person who is doing her best to overcome all of these negatives and turn them into positives. A person who is loving where she is at this point in time, no work, lots of books, learning, travelling.

So thank you Post40, for making me take this look at myself!

If you haven’t worked it out, this post was inspired by Post40 Bloggers!

C'est moi! But not a recent one! I am considerably greyer than this now.

C’est moi! But not a recent one! I am considerably greyer than this now.

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2 Responses to Mirror Mirror on the wall….

  1. Helen says:

    I see a friend… someone who can reach out and achieve her dreams and who has the time to make them possible. I see someone who sometimes puts off the things she should do today till tomorrow … a tomorrow that does not always come … when those things are important to her … whereas if it were for someone else and they asked her… she would make time today!

    I also see a person who puts on a brave face, who projects a different image on the world than the one she sees herself … someone who is wise, who has a wealth of knowledge and who needs to understand that other people admire her for whom she is, the person they see … and who they wish she could see too…

    Instead of looking in the mirror looking at yourself … I wish you could be a fly on the ceiling and see how others see you … you would be surprised ….

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, you made me cry!! I think perhaps I took the Scout Promise a bit too literally – A Scout thinks of others before themselves!
      I am working hard on improving myself and my self esteem, not easy! I and on being more pro-active – I promise!
      Thank you, I love you and miss you!


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